Re: A Hard Time Taking Authority
I have had some trouble with assertiveness on my team, but it has more to do with my wanting to be nice than because I'm a woman.Your drummer should have learned in his training that the drum is to "hold the groove", not set it. You set the tempo and he keeps it. You may want to have a pre-arranged signal (such as directing behind your back) when you want to pick up the beat. Or you may want to have a signal for him to drop out and listen, then come in at the beat or tempo you are singing at. If this doesn't work, find another drummer. I have fallen into the trap of thinking that I can't do without someone, even if they won't submit. These kinds of clashes take the focus off the only One who deserves the spotlight. Usually, it is a case of not knowing the boundaries of what the leader will take from a team member. You need to convey that you have probably prayed about, and planned for, the song list long before you came to practice. Therefore, you will do the songs as you (and God) have previously planned, and you are not open to suggestions from members who have not put in that time.You may want to have a chat with your pastor about his approval of you as a leader. If you have submitted to church leadership, and they have given you this position, your team needs to know and honor this. This should also give you added confidence in yourself as the leader. It was nice of your saxplayer to go to bat for you, but there will be more unity if you fix your own problems as you go. Another area of not playing "follow the leader" can come from having a person who may be a worship leader themself. Everyone needs to know that the Sunday you are scheduled to be the leader, you plan to be the leader, and they need to follow or not be used.I think of the verse "in Christ there is no male or female" in answer to your question about a woman leading a man. If a spirit is raised in worship to God, I don't think God stops to ask, "Is that a man or a woman praising me?" Again, if your pastor has approved you, then you are in the right place.I encourage you to make prayer the first and most important item on your practice agenda. This may be prefaced with what you feel God is leading the service into on Sunday. Prayer is very unifying and powerful, and your thoughts will be effective in getting everyone on the same page.I'm sure you are doing a terrific job and are a great blessing to those in your congregation. Be strong and take heart!
Your drummer should have learned in his training that the drum is to "hold the groove", not set it. You set the tempo and he keeps it. You may want to have a pre-arranged signal (such as directing behind your back) when you want to pick up the beat. Or you may want to have a signal for him to drop out and listen, then come in at the beat or tempo you are singing at. If this doesn't work, find another drummer. I have fallen into the trap of thinking that I can't do without someone, even if they won't submit. These kinds of clashes take the focus off the only One who deserves the spotlight. Usually, it is a case of not knowing the boundaries of what the leader will take from a team member. You need to convey that you have probably prayed about, and planned for, the song list long before you came to practice. Therefore, you will do the songs as you (and God) have previously planned, and you are not open to suggestions from members who have not put in that time.
You may want to have a chat with your pastor about his approval of you as a leader. If you have submitted to church leadership, and they have given you this position, your team needs to know and honor this. This should also give you added confidence in yourself as the leader. It was nice of your saxplayer to go to bat for you, but there will be more unity if you fix your own problems as you go.
Another area of not playing "follow the leader" can come from having a person who may be a worship leader themself. Everyone needs to know that the Sunday you are scheduled to be the leader, you plan to be the leader, and they need to follow or not be used.
I think of the verse "in Christ there is no male or female" in answer to your question about a woman leading a man. If a spirit is raised in worship to God, I don't think God stops to ask, "Is that a man or a woman praising me?" Again, if your pastor has approved you, then you are in the right place.
I encourage you to make prayer the first and most important item on your practice agenda. This may be prefaced with what you feel God is leading the service into on Sunday. Prayer is very unifying and powerful, and your thoughts will be effective in getting everyone on the same page.
I'm sure you are doing a terrific job and are a great blessing to those in your congregation. Be strong and take heart!
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