Women in Worship by Debbi Barnett Worship Leader October 13, 2009

It's been almost a year since I wrote Consistency Please. I must admit that my journey for consistency in Him has taken me on yet another journey down a different road. Since last speaking with you, about Consistency Please, I have turned a year older, the new car that I owned was totaled in a flood; I resigned my position as Worship Pastor at my church; and moved from Northern. California to Southern Nevada, Las Vegas to be exact!

Now that would explain the ministry transition I felt coming on. It would also explain the temporary living arrangement that the Holy Spirit told me would not last very long. Eight months ago I was asked to come to Las Vegas to check on a condo that my parents owned. My parents, who live in Los Angeles, have owned the condo for 10 years but only lived in it for a weekend once a month. For the last 4 ˝ years it has sat empty except for an occasional visit from a family member or friend that would spend the night or weekend and play in the adult backyard "The Strip".

I planned a visit to check on the condo in Vegas because Pop, my step father, is deathly ill. My Mom is the primary care giver for him therefore, she needed help managing things. Her health is also failing. Her blood pressure is dangerously high, which is a source of great concern to me. I am the eldest daughter – I'm sure you know how that can be. When I walked into the condo, I immediately began to clean out the place as much as I could. Do I have to tell you about the build-up of dust and dirt there was in the place? Not to mention the fact that my parents both smoke which caused my allergies to really kick-up fast! Everything felt dirty. I was making a mad dash to make it right. After all this was my parents get away. I had to bring some dignity to their home away from home!

I stayed for 2 nights and headed back to Northern CA. It was a 10-12 hour drive so it gave me plenty of time to think. Although I had a lot to think about, it was not about moving to Nevada. Prior to my leaving, my sister called to say that my paternal grandmother had been standing outside of her house, refusing to go inside because she thought that someone was trying to kill her. The truth was that she had turned all four burners on the gas stove to the "on" position and left them on for at least 24 hours. She had been sleeping in her room with the door closed. I realized that my grandmother could no longer live by herself, which put more pressure on me to be closer to my Mom and Pop, my grandmother and other family members for support.

It had been 12 years since I had lived in Los Angeles. The thought of moving back to Los Angeles brought many mixed emotions. When I left I was so co-dependent on my mom it was sickening. I did not want to fall back into being the daughter who could do everything but live her own life. Long story short, I made a decision to move into the condo in Las Vegas. As soon as I made the decision, I felt that I should have been there yesterday.

In my "mind" things started to fall in place. I felt that finally I would have consistency. I even had two families drive to Vegas to help me move in and also to paint the condo. I was going to find a job and start my life over her in Las Vegas, NV. After all there is life away from the Strip right? I was financially prepared to sustain myself for two months while looking for a job. But I ended up sitting for three and a half months. Do you know what that means? It means NO money coming in! My diet was soup and cereal. I had to cut back on everything (I wish I could insert those emotions that I used in my emails) that was not normal for me. I had to do my own nails, my own hair, give myself a pedicure and live without getting massages! What's a girl to do? The clothing that I wore in Northern CA was not suitable for the desert. Although I had gotten rid of a lot of things, e.g., clothing, TV, chair's, my dog, etc., the thing that I now needed were not available because I had no money to buy them. Not to mention the heat of summer that was creeping up on me quickly. I mean temperatures of 100 plus! OH God where are you? Now did I mention that when I asked for God's OK to move to Las Vegas all he said was "YES," and then He added, "Look for a church home." Nothing else was said He was very silent.

I finally got the place in order. I stored a bunch of stuff, including my parent's furniture, because it was not my style and they were filled with the lingering odor of cigarette smoke (YUK!) I ran through my savings as if I was going to have a great paying job tomorrow. I was comfortable but I was B R O K E at the end of three months. To top things off, I did not have a church home yet. So I was in a strange place with no family in sight, spiritually or naturally. I was going to die. I left my church family and friends in California where I was in full fellowship and in full time ministry, busy, busy, busy!

Continue >>>

Page  1  |  2  |  Next

Printable Version
Email this Page to a Friend	Add Your Opinion

Be the first to add your opinion about this article. Click HERE Now!
Add Your Opinion